My wife and I just had our second child and we need to move into a larger house. Luckily, we found this amazing deal where the developer sealed up the business end of a dormant volcano with cement and then built a beautiful three-bedroom house on top of it. The price is certainly right, but can you think of any reasons why we shouldn't move into it? Can you get back to me soon, I understand there's another couple interested. - Forest (Mauna Kea, HI)
-Before signing that lease, make sure the volcano is actually a volcano and not a mudcano. Nobody wants to live atop a mudcano, dormant or not.
-Visit the house at night, just to get a better sense of how safe the neighborhood is.
-Be sure the developer didn't originally seal the volcano with concrete for the purpose of trapping a demon or some other evil spirit.
-Check for hot floors regularly.
-Make sure your children's school has a bus that can drive up the side of a dormant volcano.
-If something is too good to be true, it might just be. Find out why the price is so low.
-Dormant volcanoes are mother earth's dried up tear ducts. Never forget that.